Jessica Firth-Brown
Whilst for many Christmas is, as Andy Williams would say, the most wonderful time of the year, for separated parents it can be an extremely stressful and emotionally difficult time.
Christmas is for many in the UK the most important holiday of the year. Understandably, parents want to spend every Christmas with their children. Unfortunately, this is unlikely to be possible for separated parents.
So what can I do?
The most important thing to remember is that any decision you make should be done with your child/children being the centre of your decision making process. Whilst you may want them to spend Christmas with you every year, they also want to see their other parent just as much as they want to see you.
The best way to address Christmas arrangements is to think about this early. Ensure that you and your co-parent have plenty of time to discuss different options and arrangements to see what will work best for you.
Many parents chose to alternate Christmas yearly, with the children spending time with one parent on Christmas Day and spending Boxing Day or another day close to Christmas with the other parent, this then swaps each year between the parents.
Some parents chose to split Christmas Day with the children spending half the day with each parent.
There is no right answer as to how your children should spend Christmas, it is about what works best for you, your co-parent and most importantly your children
What if we just cannot agree?
In circumstances where you and your co-parent cannot agree on the arrangements for Christmas the starting point is to seek advice from a Family Solicitor. Your specialist Family Lawyer at Sills & Betteridge can advise you on the most appropriate next steps based on your circumstances.
In many cases, a referral to mediation will be required. A mediator is an independent third party who can assist you in reaching an agreement. More can be found about mediation here.
If agreement cannot be reached it will be necessary for you to make an Application to the Court for a Child Arrangements Order. A Child Arrangements Order deals with all aspects of how a child is cared for including the time they spend with each parent (previously known as Custody pre 1989 and Residence pre 2014). Further information about different Orders available to separated parents can be found here.
An application to Court can take several months, it is therefore extremely important you start thinking about the arrangements for Christmas as soon as possible.
Should you and your co-parent not be able to agree the arrangements for your children and you require any further advice or information then please contact Family Law Partner Jessica Firth-Brown on 07471 033407 or JFirth-Brown@sillslegal.co.uk. We offer a 60 minute Preliminary Advice Meeting via telephone followed up by a full letter of advice for £180 plus VAT.